too fat and too thin

I was talking to one of my aunts the other day, and completely out of nowhere, she laughingly says, "Don't go eating all that rice in Japan and come back fat like last year." !?!?!?! It caught me by surprise and if I hadn't taken a second I probably would've said something really nasty in return. For some reason she thought that I would laugh with her instead of being really hurt by her comment.

Most people don't know how much I struggled last year because of the weight I gained. It really wasn't that much but it deeply affected my self-esteem for several months (it still does). And it was so hard to lose because first all of my life I'd been underweight for my height and I've never been on any diets or had to exercise a lot. Second being overweight makes you want to eat more not less; the depression associated with it also keeps you indoors more and consequentially less active. I even bailed out on an orientation panel because I was so self-conscious. I somehow managed to lose a little before Thanksgiving break but winterbreak at home was my real turning point. Sadly it was mostly when I was with my family that I felt my weight was a problem. Not even an hour after I got back home from Japan, I was called chipmunk cheeks and told that I looked very "country healthy" etc. I don't think I'll ever completely forgive them for that.

And now that I am smaller than before, they haven't been easier on me. When my family came up during graduation weekend, they all noticed of course. Saying that I was too thin but mostly asking me how I lost the weight and some wondering if I had developed an eating disorder (i'm seriously not that thin). When I visited Philly in June, someone said that I was starving myself. But no one commented when at every meal I ate the most out of everyone. I'm sure if they did it'd be something stupid like maybe she's pregnant.

Sadly I don't even think most of them are asking because they're concerned about my health but because they want to undermine my success because they haven't been able to lose weight. I've been incredibly supportive of them too. I've never said anything to make them feel bad. Even when my 300lb cousin commented about my weight, I was surprisingly good-spirited about the whole thing when I could've easily and justifiably said worry about your own damn fat.

Maybe I should get a doctor's note *___does not have an eating disorder* and just carry it around like a business card.